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Woman Had Hysterectomy
Out of Fear!
That nobody
is quite sure these days what Karen Taylor does for work, that she once had
a "relationship" with the butchering Dr. Olivia Winters would explain why,
based strictly on fear of the unknown, Taylor had her baby-making machine
removed. Daily Daze
Festival of the Dead
With members
of the Newman Klan thought to be under local District Attorney surveillance,
Nick Newman blathered that no matter how
many jobs he has, no matter how many criminal
activities he participates in, work will never come
before family and having the tacky room he lives in
decorated for Halloween was of particular consideration for his
sleepy, over-dosed on sugar, kid.
Daily Daze
Hunkmonkey Hellstrom
Stirs Toxic Witches Brew, Spoils Pagan Pie
Her
4-year-old Newman daughter having bad dreams about "bugs",
Phyllis Newman told of how Newman Security Chief
J.T. Hellstrom had exterminated the electronic
critters found in "three"
buildings on the Ponderosa and yet
there was no complaint by baby Reed Hellstrom living
on the same property of
having bad dreams unlike his broom-riding witch of a
mother who would later feel a "presence".
Daily Daze
Badly Written Soap Opera
Scripts Part 2
Keeping track of where the Newmans
are at any given moment, Heather Stevens did not know that Nick Newman
interfered with the duties of a police official.
Daily Daze
Pin the Tail on the
Donkey
Real cops
don't introduce themselves like snakes on a plane to those they've just been
assigned to tail because then what would be the point of tailing Nick Newman
if he knows who the tail is? Well, that's the point. There is no point. And
how would Newman know "the best steaks in the world" are served in Argentina
when the only foreign country he's ever been to is Switzerland?
Daily Daze
How To Write a Story
Nobody Will Believe
You must have
a scene where the town whore goes looking for her ex-husband when not more
than an hour ago he'd told her of his catching a plane out of town.
Daily Daze
It Ain't Easy Being
Sleazy
Is the
publishing of Victor Newman's "diary" the dumbest thing you ever did hear
about? Is it really possible that a publisher, after skimming a few pages of
said diary, would say it'll be in bookstores soon? Is this diary the "mother
lode"? Will anyone believe that "some stranger in Mexico" approached Jack
Abbott and his semi-illiterate spew monkey Adam Wilson offering to the sell
the diary to two gringos in the country for all of an hour?
Daily Daze
If I'd Known Your Were
Bugging I'd Have Baked a Cake
Sugar? What
white girl begs for sugar? If Phyllis Newman wanted to put on a convincing
show, why not do it right? Why wasn't she saying, "F me! Give me your big...
deeper! Deeper!" Daily Daze
The Grim Reality
When it comes
right down to it, if you're old and in need of constant medical care, the
sooner you die the better for you and your family.
Daily Daze
Soldiers of Misfortune
Had there been a need to
bring up how bad war is, that like the Vietnam War
the government lied to get us into Iraq, there could have been Iraq War
veteran Billy Abbott or any number
of other younger men in Genoa City suffering from
the effects of Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome. But
no, there aren't any Iraq War vets in Genoa City. Abbott won't be going off
to war any time soon. Daily
Daze
The Pain in My Ass
It's coming up on Halloween, but seeing freakish, teenage-like, little girls
whining about their lonely nights with the Magic Hitachi is downright
creepy, crawly stuff. And Colleen Carlton, someone needs to give this girl a
good screwing. She and Lily Winters are "man-less"? Whose fault is that?
Daily Daze
Peace, Love, Stop the
War!
Right theory,
wrong age group, if ever there was a time to bring up what's wrong with a
lied to get us into war and kill our precious children, it should have been
Kevin Fisher or Daniel Romalotti or any number of the boys in Genoa City who
have yet to join the Armed Services.
Daily
Daze
Rich Feeling Money Crunch
Why are the Fishers short on cash? Doesn't Mr. Fisher have two jobs? Isn't
one of those jobs at Jabot Cosmetics where he has a big office and must pull
down $100,000 annually? For two people on the brink of bankruptcy, why
didn't Mrs. Fisher raise hell when her man hired a part-time manager to run
their coffee shop? Daily Daze
Phone Chips Ahoy
Disorganized
crime mama Nikki Chow is one amazing woman. Long fingernails and hangnails
be damned, to prevent valuable information about the man who doesn't want
her sorry ass from falling into the hands of law enforcement, Chow popped a
cell phone "chip" with ease. It was actually a "smart card", but who
would expect an old cow to know that, or that cell cards are worse than
wireless mice battery compartments to get at.
Daily Daze
Billy Abbott, Jack
Abbott, and what the Gardener Saw
Left town at the ripe old age of twenty-something, Billy Abbott was keenly
aware that to get ahead in Genoa City it's often necessary to stab your
parents in the back. The Abbott Mansion gardener, observing Jeff Bardwell
leave the grounds, knew it was no ordinary departure and thus I've got
worthless proxies up my ass Jack Abbott should be told.
Daily Daze
School's Out Forever!
Wasn't it odd
that for a teenager who hasn't been in school for much more than a hour,
whose teacher contacted guardian Lauren Baldwin to say the child hadn't
attended class, the school would later send a letter to Mrs. Baldwin
pertaining to the school "field trip" which Eden Baldwin has been selected
to participate in? Aren't trips like this reserved for only the best
students? Exactly how many other students will be going on this excursion?
The entire school? For an entire week?
Daily
Daze
I Married a Slut?
Be amazed as Sharon Abbott learns that her husband used his credit card at the Motor Arms Hotel which happens to be
the same hotel where Sheila Carter coordinated her
crime spree and concludes that Jack Abbott took a
whore to the hotel for sex and he didn't mention her fling with Brad Carlton in a New York hotel room.
Doesn't Mr. Abbott know he married a slut?
Daily
Daze
A Family of Terrorists,
Mother & Son Seen At Protest Rally
As if the
Lowell 'a river runs through it' Baldwin story couldn't just end with the
hippy's incarceration for a series of crimes committed during and after the
60's, evidence will surface soon if the form of a photograph which shows it
was Baldwin's old lady, Gloria in the crowd holding the then infant son
Michael during a protest outside a bank the now old man claims he never set
off a bomb inside killing a man. Meanwhile, the darling daughter Eden
Baldwin, having avoided juvenile detention, is off to Paris on a public
school-funded field trip. The Daily Daze
Hate and Bad Sex
Class, what was the topic of today's lesson? No, not that a public school
can afford to send students on field trips to France. Try again.
Daily Daze
New Game! Which Toxic
Soap Chapter Is Most Insulting?
Tired of
conspiring to break the law in public places, Jack Abbott, with his kiss ass
partner Adam Wilson, conduct their dirty business from the inside a seedy
thin-walled motel and nobody notices the elite, former senator, and the went
to Harvard Newman outcast coming or going.
Daily
Daze
Crime Complete,
Hunkmonkey Phones Home!
It's the toxic sickness that's supposed to make us
believe that in the blink of an eye J.T. Hellstrom could be in
Brazil and then dumb shit that he is call his ugly
wife to say he'll be home soon. Oh yeah,
Hellstrom knows what he's doing. Like he knew what he was
doing during the Clear Springs saga.
Daily Daze
Hamiltons Reunited and It
Feels So Stupid
Because the
ritzy New Hampshire music school wouldn't allow student Ana Hamilton to
speak on the phone with her brother, Devon Hamilton waited until he'd
presumed that Ana Hamilton and her faux mother had gone missing before
calling the other number he had for the Hamiltons. Why is that?
Daily Daze
Old Woman Resents Old Age
A good eighty years old, Katherine Chancellor should be grateful she's lived
for as long as she has and stop bitching. We're all getting old and there's
no stopping it. Daily Daze
Delinquent Teen Escapes!
Fifteen-year-old Eden Baldwin only aided and abetted the escape from police
custody of her hippy dippy father and joined Lowell Baldwin on his short run
from the law when she should have been in school. Is that any reason to have
her charged and sent to a level-12 group home?
Daily Daze
There Ought to be a Law
With all the free legal advice there is to be had in Genoa City, Amber Moore
should have called a lawyer, not some goddamn radio talk show with its
whopping "two million" listeners.
Daily Daze
ADA Responds to Lover's
Second Act of Crime
Having jumped bail once and left the jurisdiction
twice, Adam Wilson has yet to appear in court
on a previous trespassing charge so naturally he'd
want to trespass a second time given he's under the Assistant District
Attorney's loving wing. Daily Daze
Newman On 'Press Junket'
Back at the Newman Empire to soothe the nerves of jumpy stockholders, Nick
Newman leaves town on a "press junket". Press junket? What's that?
Daily Daze
On the Lam, Teen Stops to
Snooze
It may be the craziest damn thing you'll ever hear.
Adrenaline pumping, not yet beyond city limits, on the run with her fugitive
from the law father, Eden Baldwin stops to take a nap!
Daily Daze
If I Weren't Me, Who
Would I Be?
Even as Katherine Chancellor's alter ego says the
uneducated, terrified right-wing Bible set that's
shackled to the mammoth cruise ship of ignorance
should forget their troubles by tuning into a
mindless soap opera for an hour each day, we the
other half know better.
Daily Daze
Newman Revives Thought
Extinct Toxic Chemical
It's like Coca Cola announcing a comeback of that
swill they called "new coke".
Daily Daze
Magic Sick Pill Led to
Hippy's Escape
With
Lowell Baldwin's daughter
at the Jitter Joint being creeped out by the masturbating in his pants
Noah Newman, no wonder Eden Baldwin had nothing
better to do than help daddy escape.
Daily
Daze
Informant Voted For Bush!
If the
Lowell Baldwin tale of blowing up a bank, killing the janitor, going on a
40-year run from the law and yet landing a teaching job where he was able to
have sex with a minor student and then also licensed by the State of
California to perform weddings didn't make sense before, surely it does now
since reportedly an FBI informant who could prove Baldwin's innocence is
said to have voted for Bush. Daily Daze
No Babies For Woman
With Bad Mother Gene
With Karen Taylor so worried she's got the gene that turns women into bad
mothers, shouldn't the Centers for Disease, not to be confused with the God
Have Mercy Medical Center, order that Genoa City be quarantined? The city is
crawling with bad mothers. Daily Daze
Nick at Night and Day &
Name On Door Too!
It was a
deal Nick Newman couldn't pass up. His fashion magazine understaffed, sales
marginal, mother and wife employees at each others throats, given the chance
to also work at his daddy's empire, Newman will work both jobs primarily
because his name will be on the Newman Enterprises door.
Daily Daze
The Only Good
Mobster Is a Dead Mobster
When will somebody tell Assistant District Attorney Heather Stevens that the
local District Attorney's Office has no jurisdiction in Mexico? Isn't there
enough unsolved crime in Genoa City to keep Stevens busy, like the fact that
her boyfriend jumped bail and has yet to appear in court on trespassing
charges? Daily Daze
Baby's Mama Hacked Into
Daddy's IP Address
Viruses,
spyware and malware and slipping past firewalls to access some of the finest
computer systems in all of Genoa City is commonplace, but hacking an IP
address? How exactly does one hack an IP address, how did Chloe Mitchell
pull it off, and when did she do it? On the most boring day ever?
Daily Daze
Bad Marriage Better
Than No Marriage
No matter how many times she's told that she's a lying, betraying skank,
Sharon Abbott keeps coming back for more humiliation and when told her
marriage is on the skids has the audacity to ask "is it really that bad?"
What is wrong with this woman? Daily Daze
Grounded, Naughty Teen
Made to Shovel Horse Shit!
Said to
have had a "crush" on an angry teen he'd met once who had told him he's a
"loser", teenager Noah Newman lied his way into an un-chaperoned warehouse
party, was quickly busted and as punishment made to shovel horse shit at his
beloved grandpa's horse ranch. No immediate word was forthcoming as to
whether Newman would also be made to clean up the dung excreted daily by his
parents and step-parents or the big turd Katherine Chancellor dropped at the
Jitter Joint. Daily Daze
Let Them Eat
Pencils
Say it ain't so! Rabid fans of horniest couple in all of Genoa City sent
pencils to scribe responsible for poorly written soap?
Daily Daze
Angry Teen Give Guardians
the Slip!
Living
in a condom with only one way in and one way out, how did it happen that
angry teenager Eden Baldwin gave her don't need no stinking guardians the
slip? Daily Daze
One Pill Makes You
Larger, One Pill Makes You Small
And the pill Ma and Pa gave had a crush on Eden Baldwin - after meeting her
once when she called him a loser - didn't do anything at all except make
Noah Newman dumber. Daily Daze
Local Songwriter/Composer
Pens New Tune for Homecoming Queens
Dropping
into Genoa City for no apparent reason other than to give Devon Hamilton a
reason to live, Tyra Hamilton and her daughter Ana dropped out when the
richest woman in all of Genoa City gave them a golden parachute. His mission
in life to become the next Barry Manilow, anticipating his kin folks return,
Hamilton writes the songs that make the young boys cry.
Daily Daze
If Victor Newman
Falls Who Will Pick Him Up?
Perhaps one of the strangest mating calls anyone ever did hear, Nick Newman,
hell-bent on having his father committed to a mental institution, can't
understand why Victor Newman hasn't contacted him or any member of his
back-stabbing family. What if daddy falls again? Who will pick him up?
Daily Daze
'Fresh Face' of Jabot,
Inexperienced Carlton Given Modeling Gig 'Cause She's an Abbott!
Forgive
Jabot Cosmetics CEO Cane Ashby for he knows not what he does. Using an
ultrasound for his screensaver, Ashby is apparently too scatterbrained to
know one of the rules of the Fresh Faces contest was that Jabot employees
and members of their families were not allowed to compete. And yet Ashby
plans to hire Colleen Carlton simply because she's "an Abbott" which she
isn't except that her mother's maiden name was Abbott.
Daily Daze
Stuck in the Past
Damn you Ether Valentine! Didn't you know that by putting your daughter in a
boarding school you were depriving her of a "normal" life in Genoa City?
Daily Daze
September
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