Potty-Mouth Newman Bites Hand That Feeds Him
What short memories morons have. Nick Newman must have forgotten the many times Victor Newman has forgiven him. The Daily Daze

Murder Charges Dropped!
Never Lost a Case ADA Flubs Newman Indictment
Off the legal hook, wrongly arrested and charged with the murder of Mr. Kim Chee, Victor Newman is not expected to sue the pants off the City of Genoa now that it has been discovered the District Attorney's case against him was riddled with holes so big a fake eye-witness could drive a bus through them. The Daily Daze

Don't Ask, Don't Tell
A gift horse looking him in the mouth, why didn't Michael Baldwin ask Carol the fake witness who approached her? Who put all that money in Carol's bank account? Might it have been Jack Abbott? David Chow? When wouldn't an attorney be interested is such details? When the attorney is nothing more than an ambulance chaser? The Daily Daze

Power Failure Expected at Chancellor Industries, Jabot
Told there's nothing seriously wrong, but she could croak, old toad Katherine Chancellor's removal from the power grid could cause a major outage. The Daze Ahead

Only His Hairdresser Knows For Sure
Where did Daniel Romalotti get his new do? At the Oh, My Nappy Hair salon in Atlanta? Oakland? Los Angeles? Nope. Romalotti got it right here in Genoa City and we got proof. More

Business Boners!
Sharon Abbott back from a whirlwind NVP promotional tour that took her to two cities one of which she merely spent the night in a hotel? Daniela Romalotti getting a job as a photographer's assistant and unwittingly becoming Genoa City newest porn queen? Brad Carlton demanding to permanently fill the void left behind by Nick Newman and claiming to have the only connection with the most important of Newman Enterprises clients? What kind of business boners are these? The Daily Daze

The Gay Guide to Hot Dudes
Lesson #1 - Hit on the dude you're interviewing. More

Kevin Cockroach Expands Criminal Career; Hacks Into Phone Company Computers!
His fear of being locked up a distant memory, his rap sheep getting longer, and his gothic bride-to-be recently released from prison, at the suggestion of his crooked barrister brother and with a condoning pill-popping panic attack-driven sister-in-law at his side, Kevin Fisher keeps on breaking the law. The Daily Daze

Newman Fires Twisted Lawyer
Asking the million dollar question "What kind of lawyer are you?" and getting no answer, charged with murder Victor Newman fires Den of Thieves playmate Michael Baldwin. The Daily Daze

I Was Robbed!
A whiny rant by Liza Van Horne

Was Newly Blackmailed Woman Pressured?
What drug is Lauren Baldwin ingesting that causes her to forget she has a baby in need of sitting and can't just leave home without a sitter even if Fen-Fen Baldwin is attempting to set a record for sleeping as Noah Newman used to do? And what would cause Mrs. Baldwin to ask if her being blackmailed mother-in-law was pressured into marriage unless she's stoned out of her mind? The Daily Daze

Jazz Club May Add Lava Cake to Menu
Like one of those headlines out of Weird News, only in Genoa City would the owner of a jazz club say he may add cake to the food menu. The Daily Daze

Scratching the Surface
Why are all the young male socialites in Genoa City such lezbos? Roxanne "Beard" NoLastName isn't fooling anyone. Between the Lady Lumberjack, Kevin "Fresh Fruit" Fisher, and Porniel "Lady Elf-Hair" Romalotti, they are all complete girls. Fashion/Style

Newman's Set New Divorce Record
Married and divorced so many times it would take a professional statistician to accurately list who've they've been married to and divorced from, two of the pillars of Genoa City society, Victor and Nikki Newman were this week granted parting of the ways. The Daily Daze

Disqualified?
As charges of political cronyism and fraud swirl around the Faces of Jabot Contest and another of the six local finalists (Sally Rollins) is seen for the first time, the GCN projects that #1 finalist Lily Winters and her connection with Jabot Cosmetics via Cane Ashby will be found out and Winters disqualified. The Daily Daze

GCN Urged to Reprogram Columnist Van Horne
"That you are the purveyor of such filth is astounding to me, and sir, I do not know how you are able to sleep at night." More

Faces Of Jabot Contest Shocker!
Of all the women there must be in a mini-megalopolis the size that Genoa City is said to be be, how voting fraud suspicious is it that the results of a nationwide talent contest would harvest only two finalists from outside the city, six from within, and of the six the top two are youngsters in a contest that was said to have encourage old and young alike to enter? The Daily Daze

Inexperienced Girlie-boy Seeks Work as Professional Photographer
Another example of incredibility at its finest, not yet out of college, rarely seen attending class or cracking a book, sweet on the district attorney's assistant Daniela Romalotti need only wish upon a star and his dream job will come true. The Daily Daze

Free - To Kill Again!
The decision a "pragmatic" one, with protestors clogging the steps of District Court, and free Jana T-shirts visible for as far as the eye could see, the Genoa City District Attorney's Office handed down a ruling that confessed killer Jana Hawkes cannot be held accountable for the death of Carmen Mesta and in the blink of an eye Hawkes was freed from prison. The Daily Daze

Victim Feared Hawkes Would 'Haunt' Him Forever
Kevin Fisher wanted the State of Wisconsin to reinstate the death penalty and for Jana Hawkes to become only the second person the state had ever put to death. So what went wrong? More

NVP "Worthless"; Owner Should Be Tricking Treats On the Streets
Showing again why he is the man, Victor Newman scoffed at the idea of purchasing a chain of wellness spas and told his betraying wife she should be back on the streets where he found her. The Daily Daze

"I Am Not a Yes-Man"
As the recently appointed co-CEO of Newman Cosmetics, has Neil Winters crawled back into the bottle, or has he always been drunk on delusion? The Daily Daze

Jerk of all Trades
The gold spoon removed from his big mouth, who will give Nick Newman a new, fancy, requires no experience or education, job? And what is Sharon Abbott doing promoting Sweet Adorations? Who exactly does she work for? More

Can I Get a Witness?
Jumping Genoa City Justice! After the long delay following the death of Mr. Kim Chee of cordoning off the crime scene, after allowing the scene to be tainted, the subsequent fire, the lousy police work, Assistant District Attorney Heather Stevens didn't have an eye-witness when she arrested the great Victor Newman? The Daily Daze

Ashby Proud to Be a Chancellor?
Pop Quiz: Your birth name is Rockefeller, or Newman, or Chancellor. By some freak of nature you got the name Ashby and later learned what your true surname is. Which then would you go by to make your mommy and granny proud? The Daily Daze

Free Jana Hawkes T-shirt Campaign Seen as Overnight Success
Imprisoned without a trial since approximately July 23, 2007, when she was detained at the God Have Mercy Medical Center and subsequently transferred to the Walrus State Prison a hop, skip and a jump from Genoa City, mental case Jana Hawkes has seen her rights under the Constitution stripped away but never in a million years would she have thought a simple 11th hour T-shirt campaign could be the key to her freedom. More

Cover Your Ass-ets!
Could it be that a woman as "independent" and "successful" and rich and influential as Nikki Newman would not have had her assets protected? She would not have a financial adviser or creative accountants in place to make sure assets can't be frozen? It be. The Daily Daze

DA Stevens Picks Teen For 'Bodyguard', Personal Vibrating Knave Boy Chores
It was bound to happen that the very ADA who took credit for the incarceration of Phyllis Newman would later fall in love with the ex-con's daughter, um, son. The Daily Daze

Disgraced Senator Proposes Abbott Foundation!
It's not enough that the Newman Wreck Center was built to clear Victor Newman's guilty conscience, or that there are already a bazillion foundations and charities established in the name of dead babies and undeserving to be dead people in general, a forced to atone for his sins, former senator Jack Abbott wants to establish a foundation in the name of his dead father! The Daily Daze

Free Jana Hawkes T-Shirts In Short Supply
When will someone from the ACLU notice that Jana Hawkes has had every single one of her Constitutional rights trampled on and where can we buy a Free Jana T-shirt? The Daily Daze

Special Commentary
Remarks of race reality found offensive by 1 out of 500,000 readers. More

Debt Ridden NVP Opening New Stores, Hiring Old Mamas!
Reportedly so broke she doesn't have a pot to pee in, NVP health spa owner Nikki Newman has announced an additional two stores will be added to her chain and that she's propositioned the P in NVP with the opportunity of a lifetime. The Daily Daze

Make-believe PI Cut Loose!
So much like his mentor, pretending to be a private investigator J.T. Hellstrom showed again that he's a failure and was abruptly terminated this week by the great Victor Newman. The Daily Daze

Letter to the Producers
Has there been the slightest improvement since scribe Lynn Marie hit the bricks? Liza Van Horne says yes. More

Pedophile Promoted!
For days following the Clear Springs disaster Chancellor Industries Chief of Construction Cane Ashby, AKA Phillip Chancellor III, if that's his real name, blamed himself for major blunders that reportedly took an untold amount of human life, albeit unfortunately none from Genoa City. Now, only a few months later, with life insurance claims still being paid and legal liability uncertain, Ashby has been promoted! The Daily Daze

X-Rated Scenes We'd Like to See
With so many Genoa City elite having sex at the office and trolling for jailbait, GCN reporter Liza Van Horne, with due apologies to the Writer's Guild, took a stab at scribing a sex scene we'd really like to see. Did we mention it's X-rated? More

Indigo Stiffs Customers
Promised in writing that there would be a hot, new, female songbird at the Indigo Jazz Club, customers found they'd been stiffed when the birdie turned out to be a guy! The Daily Daze

Sex In Daddy's Office!
Newman Enterprises executive in charge of venture capital, Nick Newman showed this week why he was demoted from the role of company co-CEO he once played with his now comatose sister. Only a disgusting incestuous rodent would have sex in his father's office. The Daily Daze

TV's Ordered Off, Ex-Cons Making Threats
When did Phyllis Newman become the new Bill-0? Threatening reporters with arrest for doing their jobs, does the ex-con think this is Nazi Germany? Plus, why are televisions so feared? The Daily Daze

I Wanna Be Danny's Surfer Girl! City's Prosecutor May Catch a Wave!
A wave of disease is most likely all ADA Heather Stevens will get if she goes through with an inclination to take up with wet dream boy Daniel Romalotti. The Daily Daze

The Witch Versus the Toad - a Fable
Tell me Mr. Bardwell. What is it you do for work? How do you afford living in a fancy hotel and dining at ritzy restaurants? Cheat old women out of their life savings? That's nice. You should meet my mother sometime. More

Who Framed Victor Newman?
A tainted crime scene, spectators allowed to come and go from the victim's hotel room as they please, a subsequent fire at said scene, no blood initially found at the scene, a CSI team purportedly having gone over it with a fine-toothed comb and finding nothing, weeks later blood is found on a hotel visitor's gym bag, surveillance "discs" are found to have been doctored and Victor Newman is arrested for the murder of Mr. Kim Chee? Can there be any doubt Newman was framed? The Daily Daze

The Handmaid's Wail
She's a nurse, she's a maid, she's a nursemaid all rolled into one and she's trapped at the Newman Ponderosa. Liza Van Horne's best writing ever tells the story. More

It's Back! The Dreaded 'lifeline' Cliché
On what planet would Sharon Abbott be anyone's "lifeline"? More

Dug Out, Residents Ready to Dig In Thanks to Excellent Public Works Dept.
Stranded with persons they might not otherwise want to be stranded with for a few hours during Genoa City's 2nd Annual Winter Storm, certain residents of Genoa City were dug out late Wednesday and prepared again to dig in their heels, their nails and their knives in the tradition of hate and family values of a new year. The Daily Daze

The Hornie Awards
Like the "annual" Harvest Ball which was held only once, Liza Van Horne is hoping her first annual Hornie Awards will be such a hit they'll be back year after year. More

2007 Year in Review
Not too deep, Brent Kellogg's look at the year in review is a snapshot by which you may compare what happened in January 2007 to what will happen this month in Genoa City. More

Funeral For a Freak
Worse than Cassie Newman's return to Earth on May 24, 2006 was her funeral on May 31, 2005. Said to have been loved by so many, only a handful showed themselves at her funeral, half of those barely knew Cassie and that didn't include Cindy the doll. More

Then and Now
It's often said that the more things change the more they remain the same. For example, back in 2005 Nick Newman told step-daughter Cassie he was living a dream and it was like he couldn't wake up. Now, in 2008, Nick is still living a dream but it's his sister who can't wake up. More

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