by Brent Kellogg Brent's morning
coffee courtesy of Speeder &
Earls, Burlington, VT.
June 6, 2008
If only you readers knew what goes on in the
background here at the GCN. First, I've got to eat
some crow for writing yesterday that college deans
don't pressure their professor's to get published.
I've since been told by a credible source, they do.
So why hadn't Professor Gerbil mentioned this
before? Beats me. It's also on that topic that
another of the crew was questioning if I'm sure that
Gerbil doesn't know Amber that well. I've since
learned from fashion reporter Liza Van Horne that he
does know Amber.
"When Amber first came to town, she and Korbel had a
fling. It was disgusting to observe. They hung out
and [expletive] a few times and she began auditing
his art history class. Then he wasn't that into her
and began to pursue Colleen."
And there is too some dispute between me and Liza as
to whether the shark Victor purchased was named
"Damien Hirst shark", or as I heard "Dennison of the
Deep", I'm sure it was the latter. But then I
thought Nick said "Ebo" when he said "Evo".
So who you gonna call? Bad script busters? With all
the cross-talk it's a wonder I get as much right as
I do. Do I get any props if I'm an old person?
Now, let's see how I do with today's report.
You think Jeff Bardwell will die? Does he have a
will and who'd he leave Gloria Bardwell's money to?
What about those diamonds? Shouldn't someone be
looking into how they turned into fake diamonds,
like Gloria? Are people in Genoa City so rich they
can shine million dollar losses on? Oh damn, my
diamonds aren't real. Oh well, what's for dinner?
Sure, Gloria asked her one of her angry sons to look
into what happened, but he didn't report the
apparent theft to the cops. Why not? Because Det.
Maggie Sullivan isn't around? What about asking
super-sleuth Paul Williams to investigate? Can't the
clueless PI handle two clients at one time,
especially a paying client? Given Paul's connection
with Lauren Baldwin, wouldn't Lauren's mother-in-law
be as important to him as Nikki Chow seems to be?
Jill Abbott told Gloria today that Jeff is dead, but
she told Jeff yesterday that nobody came by to see
him at the God Have Mercy Medical Center, so it's
getting to be you never know when Jill is telling
the truth. Consider the remark she made about firing
Gloria from Jabot. The firing apparently stuck
despite the fuss Nikki made pertaining to Jill's
usurping her power. It's true that power monger
Katherine Chancellor is losing her marbles, but I
got the impression she overruled Jill.
So how long was Jeff at the hospital? Twenty
minutes? Did he really think he'd be allowed to have
visitors while he was gasping for air? How funny was
that? One minute he's gasping, the next he's talking
like nothing happened, then he's gasping again, then
he's asking for something to write on, then he's
ready to go home and the quacks let him without
requiring one of those infamous release papers?
How outrageous was it for Lauren to think the
hospital would connect her by phone to Jeff's
hospital room? She's been a patient there often
enough to know it was too soon to be asking to speak
with the patient. But then again, this is the GHM.
"Stop what you're doing, doctor! Mrs. Baldwin is on
the phone. She wants to talk with Mr. Bardwell."
"Hello?" Cough, cough. "Gloria! Is that you?"
"Jeffrey, is that you?"
"I asked (cough) first."
"It's Lauren. Are you okay?"
"When did you become (cough) so concerned about
(cough) how I am?" <click>
So, what did Lauren find out? Only that Jeff had
been released. This of course left her husband and
crazy brother-in-law wondering if Jeff was taken
away in a box, or under his own power. Lauren,
highfaluting elitist she is, couldn't find out which
it was? Fenmore's Department Store hasn't sponsored
a wing at the GHM entitling Lauren to a direct line
with the administrator so that like Victor Newman
flunkies call her with such information?
