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by Brent Kellogg
August 3, 2009

You had to have known that mere seconds would have ticked off before Nick and Phyllis Newman's renewed wedding vows would be trampled on, flushed down the toilet, because that's how worthless vows are in Genoa City. Perhaps the dumbest cluck on the planet, the vows hacked up, Nick was off to see the town whore, his former wife who dropped a bomb on his sorry ass that she and her lover/ex have broken up, and by golly, at that very moment Jack Abbott was with his ex, the now again Mrs. Newman, who of course was whining that Nick might kick her ass to the curb as he goes running back to the whore.

So as not to make matters worse, Jack kept safe the secret that the whore is carrying Nick's baby and it's not like Sharon Chlamydia cares now that she's decided to move on with her life - alone. Oh yeah, been there, done that, failed over and over, maybe this time will be the charm. Maybe this time the whore will become "stronger". She has the "resolve" to stand on her own two feet and anyone who knows this slut knows she does best when she's flat on her back with legs spread.

Almost as predicable as Lily Ashby surviving cancer and despite having a hysterectomy going on to have children, the whore won't last more than a week alone. Attending a wedding, she will feel the emptiness. She will see the shiny new ring on Phyllis' finger and resolve out of "love" not to tell Nick that he's going to be a new daddy because, and you know it's true, lies are meant to "protect" the loved ones.

And then there's Jack who cannot the smell the reeking of stink Patty Williams because she's going around town disguised as a homeless person what just happens to be staying in the back room of Mac Browning's bar because Mac has become a recruiting poster for the local homeless shelter.

Down in the dumps, so sad the whore isn't knocked up with his baby, Jack pickles his brain with town drunk Billy Abbott and so wasted neither see Patty spying on them and within hearing range Patty learns that Jack and the whore have split. Desperate for a man, Patty just so happens to have prescription medication in her pocket and has no trouble popping a pill into Jack's drink which he guzzles and the medicine must have been Viagra as in a stupor Jack has no trouble making his meat hard and sticks it to Patty after she's followed him to the very empty today Abbott Mansion and you might wonder who feeds Fisher the not seen in months Abbott dog.

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